More on my Valentines day...My Mom is out of town and my Dad decided to cook dinner for me and Declan. It was so sweet: I've never seen him cook more than chili from a can. My Dad is really one sweet teddy bear of a guy.

My mother got me a wonderful card. Well, the card was O.K., but it was the personal message that meant so much. First, some background on me and my mother is that we have had a very turbulent relationship. I have a story I tell that for me sums up my relationship with my Mom:
I was about 8 and celebrating my birthday in Texas. I was having a bad day and I'm sure I was being a pain. I remember crying at one point. I felt that my parents were doing things my brother wanted to do, and not what I wanted to do. So, I was upset a lot of the day, and I'm sure it was no picnic for my parents. That year they bought me a 'Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders' jacket, something I really wanted. Before she gave it to me, my mom said "Remember, this is because we love you, not because you deserve it" So, the message I've received from my Mother, whether intentional or not, is that she loves me, but doesn't like me. I was always too stubborn, too opinionated, too much of a "tomboy" etc.. I grew up feeling like I was NOT the daughter she wanted.

The interesting thing is that my mother and I are sooo much alike. I was just raised on the liberal west coast in the 70's and she was raised deep in the "Bible Belt" of Texas in the 50's. Those two factors can alter the development of a person greatly.

Back to the card. Since I moved back "home" nearly two years ago, Mom and I have worked a lot on our relationship, and I've seen many positive changes. This card I received was amazing: it read "I'm so very proud of you. You're a wonderful daughter and a GREAT mom to Declan. You're helping me be a better grandma!" I ask you...could a mother say anything better to her daughter?! :)

Lastly, I don't know what the heck is going on, but I've been having the craziest dreams the last couple of nights! I have no issues going on with my X, but suddenly she has invaded my dream-life. I had a dream that she came to me and begged me to get back together with her. I felt very bad for her and so I said yes, but I knew I could never trust her again and didn't want to be with her. I bought a puppy and decided that I would work my way out of the relationship and leave her the puppy so she wouldn't be so sad. How weird is that?